Are you rubbing your neck because it feels like you have a bad case of whiplash?
Maybe it’s from shaking your head in wonder at what is going on with your tween boy?
Or maybe it more from how fast you have to switch gears between “Mom, let’s play a game!” to “Don’t you get it! Just leave me alone!”?
Perhaps it’s because of all the changes in attitudes and behaviors in your tween boy have happened a lot faster than you ever imagined possible when you were holding that sweet baby boy in your arms?
Mama, everything is going to be alright.
It might not feel like it right now while you are deep in the tween trenches. But, I promise that your tween boy and you can emerge from this turbulent period with a stronger relationship than ever.
Until that point, there’s always chocolate, your beverage of choice, and supportive friends.
Hope for Your Relationship with Your Tween Boy
Today, I have the pleasure of sharing my #boymom tips for How to Connect with Your Tween Boys at the 30 Days of Tween Parenting Encouragement Party. I hope that you find these suggestions based on my experiences with my tween boys to help you deepen your connection with your tween boy.
As a mom of tweens, you may often feel like you are walking on a tightrope, afraid of making a misstep and falling with a crash.
Guess what? You will.
Oh, and there may feel like there a few bumps and bruises (mostly to your ego). But, you will survive these confusing times.
And it will be okay.
Because you are you. Imperfect. And your tween boy doesn’t need you to be perfect.
He just needs you.
Perhaps a version of you with a bit more understanding and flexibility. And maybe with a touch more openness to talk when he is ready. And you will definitely want to strengthen those empathy skills!
But, underneath all those changes in attitudes and behaviors, your boy is still there. That same sweet baby boy you carried in your arms and stared at in wonder.
He’s now just trying to adapt to his tweendom and all the hormones and changes that come with it.
He is scared. And energized. And confused.
Through it all, he has you.
Patience, mama. Deep cleansing breath in and out.
Embrace those moments filled with joy and laughter. Those shared smiles with happy memories.
Learn from the hard times. Look at what really happened and what was truly said. Take an honest look at all that went down, from both sides.
Let those bad times go. Release those negative vibes out into the atmosphere. Shrug them off. Holding on to negative serves no purpose and provides zero help.
You are stronger than that! You spent months cleaning spit up, changing diapers, and sleep deprived, right? Who knew they would be in preparation for living with a tween?
You can handle a bit of tween ‘tude. With a heart full of love and a realistic outlook, you can have a healthy and positive relationship with your tween boy.
Remember to check out How to Connect with Your Tween Boy.
Another absolutely fabulous resource for boy moms is Knights in Training: Ten Principles for Raising Honorable, Courageous, and Compassionate Boys by Heather Haupt. This book contains invaluable encouragement and tips to help you raise chivalrous boys based on knightly codes. You will find information and helpful reminders of what your boys need from you and how you can guide them as they grow.
Knights in Training lays it all out for you. Christian parents will be thrilled to have this guide that shows how to raise up boys to become independent gentlemen. With a strong emphasis on character building and strong values, Knights in Training demystifies raising sons in our modern world. Instead of trying to figure out how to help our tween boys fit into modern society, Knights in Training shows you that it’s okay-in fact, it’s even better-to seek out higher truths and principles from days of yore.
I love having the ten principles of the knight’s Code of Chivalry to reference with my boys. So simple yet potent! These principles are ones that my boys can relate to and understand. I believe having this structure and framework to refer to is incredibly powerful for tween boys. And it empowers you with knowledge, encouragement, and standards to reinforce.
With this amazing resource plus pep talk, know that you can get through these tween years with your boys.
Above all else, rejoice in knowing that your tween boy is going through a completely normal process and will be okay. Older, stronger, and wiser. And so will you 🙂
What struggles do you face as the mom of a tween boy?